Happy

HAPPY

 

People always say you smile ALL the time...I do smile all the time...But why not?

I have God in my life, great health, great family, great friends, great job, and I made all A's this semester, lol...

 

Life is Great

 

My only wish is to bless others...

 

Life is too short to be sad, miserable and etc, people make mistakes, I make mistakes and will make more but I'm growing and learning...

 

This holiday think of someone else and make them happy...

 

Do something that others may not see or know about, donate to an organization or just give someone a phone call to say I love you...

 

Love makes the world go around...

 

So tell people you love them while they are still living...

 

I love everyone and I hope you love me...

 

Have a Merry Chirstmas and see you on the 29th!

 

 

Improper LOVE

 

 

I don't believe that some people just don't know how to love...I believe that everyone knows how to love but may love differently than others...It just may not be proper for you..

 

Love...

What a beautiful word, 4 letters that means so much...

Love is beautiful. Love is powerful..Love is positive...

but Love is defined differently depending on who you ask...

To me, the definition of love is God.

In order to love me, you must first love HIM, your family, then me.

 

No one will ever love you as much as God loves us...Period. His love is unconditionally...No matter how much you change...his love never fails us.

 

I have learned that before falling in love with someone, I have to see how they love their family, their pets, their children, or anything or anyone that is important to them..

 

I have dated some many mothers and by observing how they love their children shows me how they will love me.

If she is a "improper"mother to her own children then that's how she will love you...

 

If she is selfish and only thinks of herself, then damn it, she will never be able to love you as you want to be loved...bc the only person she loves is herself...

 

We all want love...

But we all look at love differently...

What feels like love to us may not feel like love to others...

But be aware of patters...look for a partner who is consistent...has a good relationship with her children, family and friends...

 

If she disowns her own family and children...then how will she be able to love you?

 

She won't be...

 

Love is beautiful but find it with someone who knows how to love you properly...not badly.

Her way of loving may not be proper for you but for someone else...

You can find this out in the beginning stages of dating...Just don't deny what you see or feel...as I do often...

 

I start thinking maybe she doesn't love them but she can love me...Just to find out later, that I was wrong...her idea of loving someone is  improper for me...Her idea of loving someone is improper maybe bc that is how she was taught to love...who knows...but what I do know is that patterns never fail you.

 

 

 

 

Answer to our prayers.....

 

 

I pray a lot, one of my wishes is to have a partner who will pray with me..But in time, lol..

Now back to the topic...

 

I pray a lot for my family, friends, neighbors, and co workers-the list goes on...

 

As I was listening to the new J. Cole's cd "2014 Forest Hills Drive" and there is this one song called, "No Role Modelz."

 

The reason this song hits home is because I always feel that when I don't accomplish something,

 it was something I did wrong...

 

And I have prayed so many times since my breakup that maybe I could have done something different to save the relationship or maybe I could have been more available so that she wouldn't have cheated...etc etc etc

 

But this song answered my prayers, J Cole says that you can't save a woman, because she doesn't want to be saved...

 

It spoke volumes, bc I don't have the power to change someone's ways, only they can do that...

 

A heavy burden was lifted off my chest...

 

Now I can move on in peace knowing that I did nothing wrong...

 

So sometimes step out of your ordinary and try something different..It was a coworker who inspired me to buy J Cole's cd because I usually don't listen to him. But I am so glad that I did, bc it changed my perspective...

 

So when you pray just know that God answers your prayers in MANY ways...But you have to be open to hear it.

 

Have a good one :)

New Chapter

 

 

Life is good, in fact life is GREAT...We are giving so many chances to change our lives...When a breakup happens, it leaves you asking, "So what now?" In a relationship, you are living day to day making sure that both of you are okay, making sure that you fulfill your partners needs and etc...Well now, it's just YOU...so everything changes, your decisions only affect you...it no longer affects your ex.

 

Sounds good right...but before you start thinking just about YOU...make sure you leave your relationship in good GRACE..that you had closure and wish your partner the best of luck in life...Stop all contact and leave in good peace...Rather they cheated, lied, or was disloyal such as my ex...She did all of these things...and I had the choice to hate her but I choose to forgive her and move on...I made the choice to move on because I know that deserve so much more in life...

 

I prayed about it first and God answered my question...it wasn't the answer that I wanted...but in time, I realized I was in the wrong relationship with the wrong woman...

 

New chapter is about dedicating yourself to YOU again...Loving all of you...Meeting new people...And making all of your dreams come true...

 

I'm ready for my new chapter...I know that I have missed out on so much being dedicated and faithful to one person, but now I can just focus and worry about me...

 

So this is the best part of life...Moving on to the NEW CHAPTER...

 

God has so much planned for me...I can feel it.

Fresh Out Of A BreakUp

Fresh Out Of A BreakUP

Sorry for the wait, lol...Busy trying to make these A's for the Fall semester...But it's over now and I accomplished my goal! I got A's in both classes....still makes me smile.

But let's talk...Fresh out of a breakup...I am single! So you know with breakups, you always feel sad, disappointed, and a complete waste of time...that's how I feel. I'm not sad about the breakup, I'm sad because I failed myself...i jumped into a relationship with someone that I barely knew. So when the real person came out, I had no interest in her...She said all the good things and made me feel that she was the love of my life...but in reality, she wasn't. I don't even blame her, I blame myself...I saw all the red signs in the first month of the relationship and I still stayed with her...hoping she would change...I even lowered my standards just so that I could still have her....I blame myself...However, I learned from this situation and I hope some of you learn from my mistake....

The Things I learned....

1. Get to know her first, learn her flaws and see her weakness first....

2. Don't develop feelings for her until you are sure she is who she say she is....

3. Don't ever lower you standards...they are your standards and if someone loves you enough they will make an effort to meet them.

4. Don't ignore red signs just because you are lonely and just want to be with someone...

5. Always keep God first, if she doesn't bring you closer to God then she not the one....

6. Never stop working on your goals for you...such as education, career, financial stability

7. Never be afraid to let go...you meet people everyday and you never know who is waiting to meet you. 

I hope you enjoyed this :) 

Does Social Media ruin relationships???

My answer is NO…Only the two people in the relationship can ruin it…

Relationships are built on foundations...The stronger the foundation the longer the relationship last…

If you go on Facebook or any social media and disrespect your partner by flirting, engaging, and allowing other people in your relationship…the foundation must not be strong…

I love Facebook…but I won’t allow others to disrespect my relationship or my partner. If you are in a relationship then your mate should feel respected by your family, friends, and you…You should never allow others to disrespect your partner.

The point is social media doesn’t break up homes…the people in the relationship do.  

There’s nothing wrong with sharing pics and statuses about your loved ones…Just don’t let people know everything about your relationship because it’s not their business…As you may know, I’m very personal about certain things..I share what I want to share…but I hate when people ask questions regarding my relationships…I don’t even ask questions regarding my friend’s relationships…I feel it’s none of my business..Facebook doesn’t tell people your business…You do.

 

Have you ever had suicidal thoughts?

Like I really believe that most people who have suicidal thoughts don’t actually go through with it because of the fear of going to hell.

Sometimes life gets hard and harder and harder…sometimes life offers us disappointments after disappointments…sometimes you look back and all you see is FAILURE.

I will open my life to you…I have never thought about suicide until now. I don’t want to die but I really don’t want more disappointments...I have just reached the age of 34 and I really feel like I haven’t accomplished much.

Life is good though, especially when you believe in Jesus Christ because you know that every day is a GIFT. He gave up his life for me, for you and for everyone…How can I be so selfish and want to end my own life?!?

This blog is really good for me, because I already feel much better…My life may be full of disappointments but I’m not here on earth for me…I’m here on earth for God. That’s my purpose in life…to serve God.

I may not be where I want to be in life…but God hasn’t giving up on me…so therefore, I won’t give up on me either.

I love him…more than I love myself.

The human mind plans the way, but the Lord directs the steps-Proverbs 16:9

 

Do you believe in love after love?

 

Lies after lies…can pull anyone away…Why is it so hard for people to tell the truth and be honest?

Is there a such thing as an honest relationship? Or is it all a fairy-tale that we will ALL have a happy ending?

All my life, I have wanted an honest relationship where there are no lies, no secrets, no betrayal…

I had to ask myself, am I the problem? Do I make it hard for people to be honest with me???

After thinking about this for some time…I found the answer…It’s not me, it’s them…There’s no need to lower my standards just because majority of people can’t meet my standards…it only means that they aren’t for me…

God knows who I deserve and who deserves me… and whomever that person is she won’t lie to me, there will be no secrets or betrayal…

Maybe I have already met her, but time will always tell…

In the meantime, I will just continue to be me and be honest and see where it gets me…

I’m allowing God to direct my steps and he is the driver…I’m just the passenger who is trusting him to make the right turns.  

Women...All women…The struggles of being a LESBIAN

 

I love women…all women…a true lesbian…

You can ask any of my friends or exes, I used to have so much fun turning a “straight” woman out or being a woman’s first lesbian…

But after my last relationship with a “straight” woman…I look at things differently.

See I caught feelings for my ex and we ended up in a 4 years relationship and then guess what?!? She decided to live her life as a “straight” woman and please her religious parents…

It still hurts because I thought she was the one for me…the one made for me…However, she wasn’t…

I keep using quotation marks around the word straight…simply because most women aren’t straight…they just choose to live a straight lifestyle…

Years ago, My college professor told the entire class that no one is born “straight” and I have thought about that statement for years…I have read books and etc out of curiosity…and I tend to agree…

Straight women flirts with lesbians simply because of curiosity…they want lesbians to want them and they want attention….however, they don’t want that lifestyle...

I mean who would?!?

We still don’t have equal rights, we still don’t get the respect that we deserve…but this is US…

I feel bad for “straight” women who choose to ignore that part of them. Can you imagine living your entire life knowing you want to try it but scared of the risks…

The risk that you may love it and want it more and more.

The risks that your family and friends may judge you…

The risks that your loved ones may turn their backs on you…

Lesbians are the shit…we take society shit and still overcomeit…

It's a pleasure being yourself…

I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

God make no mistakes.
Period.

Do We Fear The Unknown???

I’m the type that loves romantic movies and cries at weddings…I’m the type of person who believes in love and loves LOVE wholeheartedly…However, I am afraid of falling in love…I can love a person but I never fall TOO deep, I never fall in love completely…Why is that??? Because I fear the unknown…I have seen friends and family fall in love and get hurt then it affects them in every shape of form…I don’t want that to happen to me..I don’t want to go into depression, lose everything over a breakup…

I want to bounce back and move on to the next…But it seems like when a person gives their all and fall in love they end up hurting for a long time…

I want to fall in love with someone that I know for a fact won’t do me wrong, she won’t cheat, she won’t be disloyal, and she won’t take advantage of me…and etc…

I want a guarantee that we are in this relationship FOREVER…But guess what? There are no guarantees in life, there are no guarantees that the person you “love” will LOVE you in return… the same way you LOVE them…

So I guess I need to try it for once…and just let it happen and FALL in LOVE…Because maybe…Just maybe…She will be the one and I can have the happy ending for once…

Thanks for reading…

When someone loves you….

Everyone is so good at saying, “I love you.” The three most important words that everyone loves to say. Sometimes you can be in a long relationship with someone just to find out you really don’t love them…You can be in a short relationship and have the same thing happen…so how do you know when someone truly loves you?

The real test is to break up with them…and see how they react to your absentness…if she just moves on…then she doesn’t love you…

If she fights for you and the relationship and still doesn’t want to be with anyone else but you then she loves you…I mean even after the breakup, she is still fighting for it and months later still fighting for it, then best believe this woman loves you…

Most times, our exes move on so fast and you are looking like dang, lol…how they do that…Well the truth is because she really didn’t love you…that’s how come she is able to bounce on to another one…

And you should be happy to know that…bc who wants to be in a relationship with someone who will drop you and move on without thinking twice?!? No one…so let her go and be with someone else…and meet your ride or die chick who won’t do that to you.

Why is it so hard to be friends with other lesbians?

Like since lesbians are the minority, you would think that lesbians would get along with one another. However, that isn’t the case…It seems like lesbians don’t get along at all…

What could be some of the reasons? We all know that women in general sometimes have a hard time getting along in general. Ask some of your straight friends and I’m sure they will say the same…Some lesbians tend to think there is always a competition with one another or someone wants what they have or who they have…when a lot of time, it is isn’t true…

It’s hard to trust people because we have all been shitted on at one point of time…But don’t let the past ruin a potential good friendship…

I classify myself as a stud and I don’t have many “stud” friends simply because I thought they were messy…they may try to talk to your girl or just be “fake”…these are my past thoughts…I don’t feel that way anymore, because I have learned that the problem was me not giving them a chance to be trusted…Let’s be honest…sometimes we are our own problems…thinking that someone is out to get you…when no one is probably even thinking about you…

I’m learning to trust people and really believe that ALL people are good until proven wrong…So try it as well…We need each other because we have rights that needs to be fought for and we can’t do it alone…Period…we are a family and we need to help each other and not tear each other down…

LOVE one another…because no one is perfect, but God knows that and he still LOVES all of us!

LOVE LESBIAN BLOGGER: Why is it so hard to find a good woman???? Have...

LOVE LESBIAN BLOGGER:
Why is it so hard to find a good woman????
 
Have...: Why is it so hard to find a good woman????   Have you ever asked this question before??? So why is it hard to find a good woman?  ...

Why is it so hard to find a good woman????

 

Have you ever asked this question before??? So why is it hard to find a good woman?

 

 Maybe it’s because you are looking too hard.

Have you ever lost something and you looked all over for and still couldn’t find it??? Then one day when you aren’t looking for it, it just pops up!!

 Right that is true when it comes to love…If you are spending all your time looking for it; you won’t find it…So STOP it! Let LOVE POP UP on you when you least expect it…there so many good women out there, trust me there are but each one may not be a good fit for you…so don’t stress it, the right woman will find you….

I love LOVE and I welcome LOVE, but I want my next partner to be so intrigued by me that I don’t have to approach her, hell let her approach me…As a stud (masculine woman), I always think I have to go out and get her…but for once, I’m chilling and letting her approach me. I have always tried the other way and look where it got me, single…LOL. So in life, if your way doesn’t work…then try another way and see the results.  It’s always a good thing to try something new. Live your LIFE with no worries.

 

However, let that good woman find you….Stop LOOKING for HER…Hell, I want to be surprised…

 

Thanks for reading.

Doesn't it seem like lesbians tend to move fast?!?

As a lesbian, myself, I have done this a lot as well..It seems like the best way to move on is to find another partner...However, it gets old fast...Moving fast causes more drama and etc. It seems like when I did move fast from one relationship to another, I was scared of being alone...I wanted the relationship benefits such as one a partner, company and that romantic love..Also, I wanted to front...Front to my family and friends that I was not alone..However I still was....

I am trying to break the cycle, my last relationship ended in March 2014 and I am casually dating but I want my next woman to be my lifetime partner, my soul mate...No more moving fast into a relationship without knowing the person first.

I have to admit that my last relationship changed me, not into a bitter person but a better person because I know my worth. I am worth having a faithful loving partner....Before I knew my worth but I still dealt with the bull, this time I'm not willing to deal with the bull. I know how to let go and be alone. Don't get me wrong, I still want the relationship benefits and hopefully one day I will be in another relationship but there is no rush...I'm willing to wait...I'm willing to just love me...I'm willing to spend time alone getting to know me better...I'm willing to focus all my attention on ME..

As women, we crave that affection and I'm no different....However, it is time for me to spoil myself with affection....I hope this blog helps someone, because every thing teaches us something-even the things we don't want to admit.